


World's Worst Negotiator

by melissmallfic



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Drabble, Drunk Ian, Fluff, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-31
Updated: 2015-10-31
Packaged: 2018-04-29 02:08:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5112413
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melissmallfic/pseuds/melissmallfic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ian wants Mickey to dance with him at the bar. Mickey doesn't want to. Ian's negotiation skills are subpar.</p>
            </blockquote>





	World's Worst Negotiator

There’s a point in the night when Ian’s had so much to drink that he's dancing in the bar, regardless if anyone else is or wants to. It was the tequila probably, which was why Mickey told Mandy ahead of time not to give it to him. Which is also exactly why she did. 

From his makeshift dance floor, which is actually a space meant for people to be able to walk through to get to the bathrooms, Ian stops dancing to stand and squarely face Mickey, who’s sitting comfortably at a the bar. Ian points at the space in front of him and mouths that he wants Mickey to come dance with him. Mickey holds his hand up to his ear and shakes his head, frowning exaggeratedly. 

Ian sighs and throws his head back, deeply, and drunkly, annoyed. He points again and makes even bigger movements indicating that Mickey should join him. Mickey shrugs and mouths that he’s sorry before turning back to face the bar. 

“I told you not to give him tequila.”

Mandy takes a sip of her drink. “When have I ever listened to you?”

Mickey feels Ian’s chin on his shoulder a few seconds later. “Mickeeeeey,” he whines. “Dance with me.”

Ian’s arms snake around Mickey’s middle and squeeze and Mickey feels like he’s wearing a very drunk backpack that smells really, really good. But it’s still not enough to get him to dance. “No.”

“Why not?” Ian pouts, letting go of Mickey and spinning him around in his stool so they’re facing one another. He rests his hands on the bar behind Mickey, caging him in. Mickey leans back comfortably and grins.  

“Because I don’t want to.” The puppy eyes come out in full force, but Mickey is strong. And mostly sober. “Not falling for it, Gallagher.”

“I’ll bake you a cake.”

Mickey frowns. “You can’t bake, dipshit.”

Mandy laughs, but Ian just looks more determined. “Fine. Sexual favors.”

“You are the world’s worst negotiator.”

“Why?”

“You go right from baked goods to sexual favors? Jesus, Ian. How about dinner? Buy me a watch or something?”

“I can't cook and I have no money," Ian points out. "Also, you are a slut.”

“Fuck you.” But Mickey’s smiling. “I’m not a slut.”

“Are, too,” Mandy chimes in. Mickey glares at his sister. 

“I’m sorry, is that the pot calling?”

“What do you want then?” Ian asks. Mickey just bites his lip and smiles. “No. Not that.”

Mickey stares back at him and shrugs, smiling growing wider.

"No! My dick is never good enough for you for  _days_ after that shit. No." Ian stomps his foot for emphasis.

“Your loss. Guess you’re dancing by yourself, Billy Idol.” He turns around, leaning on Ian’s arm, trying to flag down the bartender.

“Ugh, fine.”

Mickey turns back, a triumphant look on his face. “We need batteries.”

“I know,” Ian moans. “We’ll get them on the way home.”

Mandy stares at both of them, looking torn between asking for information and vomiting all over the bar. After a brief internal struggle her whole body gives a violent shiver. and she takes a gulp of her drink. "Nope, nope. I don't want to know." She shakes her head. "Never tell me."

**Author's Note:**

> Somehow I imagine this in the All the places we've been universe. I just didn't feel like writing the angst. :)


End file.
